dude, that chick is coming to see me and stay for 2 nights. I'm hitting the 3rd in the trifecta of friends.
You're one hell of a depraved bastard dude, I'm borderline speechless. You officially win.
They all have matching tattoos so they're all official bffs. I love my life.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Randomize
