His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Randomize
