Yo dont text me then not text me
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
