At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Randomize