i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
