The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
We are without power. He took ALL the lightbulbs out and hid them.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
