Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
PANTIES FOUND
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