Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
