check it out our google latitudes are spooning
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Fell in the ditch running from the pizza guy I stole the pizza from. If you are still at my house come find me, pretty sure I need stitches.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
You're breaking my sexual little heart
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
