i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I don't think brook has ever known best
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
Randomize
