I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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