Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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