And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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