apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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