I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
