I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
