it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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