she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize