MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Randomize
