Hey dude. Went to the hospital. Call me when you get up
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
