She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
