brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I was just at the bank and there was a fat lady wearing a cape. today is gonna be awesome.
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
