I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
why do cheetos always look like penises
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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