i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
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