You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Sorry I twat blocked you earlier I didn't know Sam was over. But, my house my rules, I don't have to knock before I enter. I did see naked butts and smelt "Sex Stank" in the air, we're going to have to set some ground rules when I get home. Hugs and kisses..Mom
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
