Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
The bar is so dead the tender gave us free shots for staying. They mixed 2pac and phil collins. That's worth at least three shots.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
Randomize