I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!�
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
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