you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
