Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize