Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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