can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
