Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Randomize
