She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
Randomize
