of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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