I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Just spilled a coffee mug full of scolding hot oatmeal on my bare dick. Hope you're having a good Friday night too.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
