R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
it glows. i had to have it.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Randomize
