I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
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