I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
