shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Terrible idea I love it
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
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