everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize
