Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Turned the water balloon filler into a jungle juice fire extinguisher. Please call me tomorrow afternoon and make sure that i'm still alive.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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