Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize
