Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
Randomize
