So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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