We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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