Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize