Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
