We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
