He is such a slut. More and more my type.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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