In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
My breasts were aching with rage.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
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